RE: Oddly Specific

Last week, I ordered myself a snazzy new 13" MacBook Pro, and I've been pining away for it ever since. I decided in my nerddom to look up in Google Maps the distance between Shanghai and my apartment to see how long my love has to travel to be warmly received in my arms.

I discovered that Google Maps does understand I can't drive across the Pacific Ocean - but it does not understand that I could fly. Not only does it specify that I must travel the sea, but it also specifies that instead of something like a yacht or a cruise ship or even a sail boat, I should be paddling my ever-loving arms off in a kayak. Across the Pacific Ocean.

Also, this journey, Google informed me, would take me 37 days and 16 hours. How does Google know that? How does Google know, specifically, how long it would take me to paddle a kayak across the freaking Pacific Ocean?

Update: Wolfram Alpha handles this request more accurately, but less hilariously.

RE: Boomer Sooner Baby

I am not a Sooners fan, and frankly, my alma mater hasn't made a bowl showing in the better part of a decade. But I think no matter who you root for (unless it's maybe the Gators), I think most of us can agree that the BCS system is nonsensical.



Thank you, SNL for not sucking as much as you used to, by the way.

RE: Guys, Let's Pretend

Where do people find the time? I swear. I think T-Rex is onto something: instead of the usual desire people have for more hours in the day, I probably need millions of extra years in my lifetime just to accomplish what most people can in 75-90 years.

I found out on Friday that I don't need to continue physical therapy for my runner's knee, which will save me $50/week in co-pays. However, there is a lot I need to do on my own to increase my leg strength and flexibility to keep my knees from getting worse. And I should really be jogging/ exercising etc. because I am pudgy and out of shape. I was invigorated by this news and ready to be the NEW ME all weekend.

I have also been trying to keep on top of the housework, so I spent a long, productive and exhausting Saturday doing housework and accomplishing other various things so I could truly get some exercise, relaxation and football time in on Sunday.

When I rolled out of bed to greet Sunday, I didn't even do any stretches, and I ate disgusting food all day while watching football. We had a lot of pals over, so I just got through the waking up/ drinking coffee/ eating breakfast/ reading the paper routine, and then people began to come over. Friends were at our place until 10 PM, at which point I got ready for bed, and then I slept in until 7:30 AM this morning, which didn't leave me any time for exercise (legs or otherwise) before work.

UGH.

So, tonight the husband has band practice which means I theoretically will have some time to at least do some exercise tonight, and I'd like to also do some other tasks like making myself a healthy dinner, mailing out the wedding thank yous (FINALLY, they are done!), and maybe some filing in the office so I can organize my receipts to submit some medical expenses to the ol' flex account. I do not have a good feeling about doing more than one of those things. I mean, after all, it is Gossip Girl night, not to mention I haven't gotten out of the office earlier than 7:00 PM in the past 2 weeks. Which means it will be close to 8:00 PM before I get home, and I will probably be totally exhausted.

I have plans Tues-Thursday evening after work, so if I want to enact this whole "NEW ME" thing, I'm going to have to start getting up earlier. Lord help me. This is never going to work. How do people with jobs get it together, keep up with current events, have a social life, read books and not get fat?? I'm starting to sound like a Cathy comic strip, and I'm not entirely excited about that.